Killian Thinking of You Precious Little Angel / Delia Allan Tomlin's Mum &. Alice &. Billy Beggs Family Read >>
Killian Thinking of You Precious Little Angel / Delia Allan Tomlin's Mum &. Alice &. Billy Beggs Family Close
Happy 3rd Birthday / Diana Sundwall (Friend of Family )Read >>
Happy 3rd Birthday / Diana Sundwall (Friend of Family )
Happy 3rd Birthday little Kilian. I wish you a wonderful birthday in heaven full of toy, games, and cakes. God bless you and your very wonderful family.
Happy birthday Kilian / Loni Wendt (Angel Mom )
Happy birthday Kilian! I know you are having a wonderful party in heaven with all our angels. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers. Close
Christmas Blessings / Dianne/Mom Of Angel Nicholas White Read >>
Christmas Blessings / Dianne/Mom Of Angel Nicholas White
TO YOU AT CHRISTMAS
If I could do whate'er I want to do To make complete your gladsome Christmas-Day, I would not bring a single thing to you, But I would come and take some things away. I'd take away all trouble from your heart, Each pain and sorrow I would have relieved; And every word that caused a single smart, And every hour through which you sadly grieved. I'd have them all begone - forever gone Forgotten like the things that cannot be And then each hour would be a joyful one For only good things would be left, you see Now that is what I'd really like to do, If I could do the things I wish for you. -Author Unknown
Kilian Richard Donahue / Lexi Kane (cousin)Read >>
Kilian Richard Donahue / Lexi Kane (cousin)
Hey baby cousin! I hope you are watching over your family during this time of year. They miss you dearly. I wish you could have been at your sisters' dance performance on sunday, so i could give you a big HUG. I cant wait until the day when i will be able to do that. I think about you everyday and I pray extra during this time of year. Your birthday is in 3 days! Ill be there after school! I love you and miss you. love always, your cousin lexi:) <3<3<3<3<3 xoxoxoxoxoxoxo Close
Our trip to Rochester this year / Mom Always Loving You! Read >>
Our trip to Rochester this year / Mom Always Loving You!
We made our way to Rochester today, with the 206 toys that were so generously and lovingly given in Yours and Preston's memory.
On the way down, we talked about you, talked about all the details, down to just the smallest details. Where we slept, where our families and friends were and what a loving staff they had.
We talked about when you came into Rochester, how you were taken there in a helicopter. We saw the thing you were transported in today, the same one you were flown in. I remember you lying in there, and I felt helpless. Watching you lie in there, and knowing you were going to be going on this trip on your own. And for an hour, I wouldn't be able to see. It was a tough drive down, not knowing how you were, not knowing what was going on. And just hoping that you would be alright.
I looked in on the room today that we were first brought too, where the doctors were going through with us what "might be" going on. And they also informed us at this time, that you had a bad seizure, and your breathing had changed. I remember going in and seeing you, and your breathing had changed. It was more labored, more difficult for you I could tell. And I couldn't help you, I couldn't change things for you, I couldn't take your place. I wish I could have, to spare you any pain. You were so small, so precious, so loved.
We looked in today to see there was a baby in the room you were in. I wish I could go back to 3 years ago, and just hold you, look at you, breathe you in. Just to feel you near. But I can't. I look on at other parents who are where we were 3 years ago. And I wonder- will they be luckier than us? Will they get to take their little boy home? Will they get to see their son grow? I hope they do, but I still wished we could with you. 3 years after you left us, I still wish we could watch you grow. I know even when I am 80 years old, I will still wish I could have watched you grow.
We walked past the room you died in today. We told Natalie and Leif- that this was the room. This was the room where we watched our son die. A memory that will never leave me. I have never felt such panic, and fear, and sadness as I did during those 2 hours. I wanted to put you back on life support, I didn't want to see you suffer. I wanted you to live, not die. I do remember, at one point- feeling a warm presence- was it Jesus coming to get you? Or angels watching over you? Was it that both your Grandpa's were there with us? Was Jackee there? I walked up to the door today, last year I just looked from a far, but this year I tried to open the door. It was locked. I want to look in there. Was it the same as when you were there? Was that same couch in there that we sat in and held you? Could I sit in there, or would I have just shut the door in fear of great pain? Would I feel you there? Maybe next year I'll know the answers to these questions.
None of your nurses where there this year. I really want to see Sheila again. I want to tell her Thank you. For showing you such love and care. I want to hug her, for maybe I would feel a part of you. Or remember her hugs from 3 years ago. I don't know how many times I saw her cry. You were definitly something special, she didn't even know you. Or know us. But she cared, and I know she had love for you. I saw Jane Heser today, she gives great hugs. The kind that just wraps around you, maybe you were helping her today, holding me tight. She talked about you by name. She says she remembers the room you were in, and you. We left a small tree at the desk with an ornament on it in your memory. It said on it - Those we have held in our arms for a little while, we hold in our hearts forever. I wrote your name on the back, so they will always know that came from your family.
I promise you Kilian, that your memory will live on. You are so missed, I just can't even explain how much. We get up everyday- even when we don't want to face the world, and we try our hardest to stay strong and not give up when things get hard, or things don't go quite as we would like. But we keep going. I pray, that you continue to send us strength, so we keep going. Keep going, even though you aren't with us.
I wish I could just get a glimplse of you. Just to stare into those beautiful brown eyes, to just feel your soft skin, your velvety soft hair. To look at those cute little dimples you had on your face, to sink my lips into them. And to smell you, for that would be the sweetest scent. I remember your scent, I wish I could smell it again. I only remember what you smelt like, if only I could really smell you. To feel your warm breath on my face, to hear you. To hear you say- I love you Mama. Now that would be the best gift. If only in my dreams. I pray someday............ please God someday. When my time is up, I will hold you again, and love you again, like I was born to do.
My dearest Kilian, my love for you is unconditional, and never ending. Watch over us, protect us, and send us love. Let us know your okay, that you still are around us. We need you. I need to feel your presence.
FOR YOU SWEETY AND YOUR FAMILY I KNOW HOW MUCH THY HURT SOMETIMES THE PAIN CAN BE SO UNREAL I THINK OF YOU AND MOMMY EVERYDAY IM SORRY SWEETY I HAVE NOT VISITED YOU AS MUCH AS I SHOULD I HOPE YOU KNOW THAT YOU ARE ALWAYS LOVED YOU AND KAYDE BE GOOD OK GIVE EACH OTHER A HUG WE LOVE YOU XXXXXXXXX CINDY Close
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